"Om,Narayana saranou,saranam prabathye.sremathaye,narayanaya namaya".The meaning is that "Oh,Narayana, I am surrendering to you totally,protect me"
While saying this slokam, I visualise the image of Thirupathi Balajee.
To-day, my grandson Harihar Subramanian has left for Gurgaon to pursue his studies there. He has stayed with us for three years. He is an adopted son of my eldest daughter Meenakshi.I brought him into our family when he was a little over one. To-day he is thirteen Though I was not against adoption. I warned my daughter about the boy not becoming normal, when he grows up and also about the limitations being brought about by genes.I held this view because I believed that adopted children are not cream of the crop.
Here. I must recall the story of "Awara", a brilliant Hindi film directed by late Raj Kapur. A case comes up before a Judge about a theft committed by a boy from a slum. He is being brought up by uneducated" parents". He is also not educated properly. His"father" is a declaed offender of law.
The Judge completes the hearing and postpones Judgement. In summing up his views before the Judgement, the Judge says that the bad habits come from genes and being a son of a thief, the boy, cannot be anything but a thief. During the time taken before the Judgement, the Judge comes to know that the boy is in fact his own son. In his younger days, the Judge loves a girl while studying law.He leaves for city without knowing that the girl has become pregnant. Later, he marries a rich girl to further his career in law.. The boy is brought up by some unknown people in the slum.
On the day of the Judgement, the Judge concludes that everything is decided by how you bring up the child and not by genes. Saying this, he refuses to pronounce Judgement and withdraws from the case.In this film,Prithiviraj Kapur had acted as Judge and his real life son, Raj Kapur had acted as thief. It is amazing that this film was produced and directed by Raj Kapur when he was just twenty-three. His attention to details and his ear for music made this film a phenomenal success. The song "Awara Hoon" was played in almost all marriagea/receptions in early fifties.
During the three years Harihar has stayed with us, we have loved him tremendously. In fact, we feel he is no different from Vishal,our natural grand-son through my son Kaushal. When I bid farewell to Harihar at the Bangalore air-port to-day,it was with a very heavy heart.
Harihar is smart, intelligent and affectionate. But for the fact that we have reached a stage in life where we are not able to take care of even ourselves,both me and my wife would have loved to keep him in Bangalore as he was studying in a good school. We had to spend a lot of time with him during his examinations. The one thing that bothers me is that he is not interested in studies.He feels very stressful when the examinations are approaching.
I am not able to firm up my views on adoption. I do not agree with the views of the Judge in Awara. Genes play an important part. It is only through careful monitoring of the child and his/her behaviour, that one can improve the child and make him a useful citizen of the world. For this purpose only, we felt that Hari should spend time with one of his parents.
Till to-day, we have not told the child that he is adopted.
However, I am sure about one thing. Hari is very street smart and if brought up properly in future, he will be very successful. Most definitely, he will not become a Professor. There is every chance of his becoming a CEO,given his leadership and social skills. For this to happen, Meena and Venkat will have to play a very major role. The next five years will be crucial. I pray God that Hari should bring lot of joy and happiness to his parents when he grows up.
Hari, we will miss you,
HARI-OM-HARI
Thatha
27th March 2010
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