Culture - East and West

To-day, I have read a news item which is very interesting and thought-provoking.We all know that Carla Bruni (41) had maried the French President,Nicolas Sarkozy. The news is that Carlo!s former lover Enthovern (34) has joined the "kitchen Cabinet of the President. The report also mentioned that Carla is almost talking to Enthovern, on a daily basis, to enquire about their seven year old boy who is being brought up by the father.
I was just thinking whether this is possible in the Indian context and if so, how the Press would re-act to it.How many of us would accept the fact that a wife can have a former lover. Even assuming that this is accepted, how many would accept her talking to her former lover. How many many would agree to bring that lover in close proximity. It requires a very broad mind to accept a girl as a wife with a history of former love. It also requires a broader mind to bring that lover close to you. It shows enormous trust in the wife and her former lover. Is it not great?.
In our culture, we do not trust so easily. A wife is looked at with suspicion even if she talks, in a formal way ,with a neighbour who is a male.I have read somewhere that more than fifty percent of the married couples in India are unhappy with each other. They simply carry on for the sake of society. They spend rest of their lives simply trying to "adjust" without remaining happy.The main reason why such couples still stay married is because of the children.
What is culture? It is a set of unwritten rules which are prescribed for orderly living.Following such rules brings in harmony, peace of mind and stability. Does it ensure happiness? I do not know. Scriptures say that the object of human existence is to remain happy. When it is so, why should a man and a woman stay together when they are not happy with each another. I believe that when it becomes very clear that there is no happiness in marriage, such a marriage should be ended. We boast that our culture is the best and yet more than fifty percent of the married couples remain unhappy.
With girls becoming financially independent, this is changing.
We are entitled to say that our culture is the best, but we have no right to deride western culture. They are more magnanimous. They also pardon easily as they believe in "forgive and forget" policy.We keep a load of trash in our mind as to what is right and what is wrong. We pass value judgements very easily. I have rarely seen a westerner passing value judgement. If you see a Tamil movie, even the latest ones, you will find lot of "value judgements" remarks. These judgements apply to others-and not to us.

Why don!t we come out and be open and real. We cannot do so for the simple reson that is not in our culture to do so.We prefer to live a superficial life with a set of rules we want others to follow.

Am I advocating western culture? The answer is "No". What I am advocating is that without deriding western culture, we should take the good aspects of that culture and follow them. We should remain happy. That is the object of human existence.

In my younger years I used the to repeat a joke about a western man and woman,both divorced, marrying each other.The joke was "your children and my children are playing with our children". I am now ashamed that I was an instrument in spreading this canard..